Club Tropicana…


What the actual chuff is going on with dolls for kids at the moment?!

They pee themselves, poo themselves, break dance, one even poos out surprise toys into is ‘diaper’ (or nappy as us Brits call it…). Mind you, if Ben fancied pooping out a few solid gold bars or a diamond here or there that I could cash in I wouldn’t complain….

I’ve just seen an advert on TV for a kids doll which comes with a bracelet that the child owner wears in order to tell you when the baby has been out in the sun for too long…

The 4 year old mother of the baby in said advert has clearly done a very bad job of looking after her baby. Shame on her. Shame.

She has clearly spent too long sipping a Mojito under her parasol and shades, whilst chatting with her friend about how amazing Pedro’s (her personal trainer) six pack is and how pert his bottom is looking, to notice her baby has now got a tan George Michael would’ve been proud of in his Club Tropicana music video and has floated away by itself in the pool…someone call Social Services for gods sake!!!!!

“Club Tropicana drinks are free, fun and sunshine, there’s enough for everyone! Including that Baby over there, do you want some of my Coconut Tanning Oil?!”

Here is the offending doll, someone, please have a word….

Advert: Club Tropicana Toddler, available now in all good toy shops. Comes with the “Club Tropicana Gift Pack” of oversize Ray Bans, Coconut Tanning Oil, skintight neon swim trunks, cocktail umbrellas and hair bleaching kit.

George Michael Junior…


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